I know you are wondering how twitter,bae and you are in one sentence, but for twitter addicts, or just people who kinda love twitter, this is just but a normal sentence.
So its Saturday night, you are just in your room probably eating (well that’s what I spend most of my precious time doing)……and then your bae calls you over for a sleepover. And you prolly feel like a queen…..the queen of all queens…..i mean spending the whole weekend with bae is awesome,ryt? So you take a cold bath quickly, dress up nicely and off you go to visit bae……on your way you buy him his favorite cake……ok its not like his favorite,favorite,you don’t even know whether he likes it but you always buy him such every time you go visiting him…
You get bae still in his jersey, yea the one he puts on when he is watching his football team play….he smells awful since he hasn’t showered the whole day, but you still afford to give him a kiss….i mean he is bae…he gets a kiss even if he got poop on his lips, right?……so you make him shower…cold shower…and getting bae to shower means you get to shower too. So both of you are clean now, you talk about how you spent your day and then cook together………bae is actually good at cooking and you like that.
You serve him the food and as both of you are eating; he picks up his phone and starts texting…he texts continuously during the whole eating session and you can’t help but wonder who or what he is texting to…..you even start wondering if he is cheating on you…or if he is flirting with some other girl…or maybe he is just replying to those safaricom texts they always send you when they are bored. You control yourself and you don’t even ask him who he is texting…you don’t even know how to start the sentence….’who are you texting?’ or ‘what are you doing?’…or ‘is your phone OK?’…
Hmmmm…its now sleep time…your favorite thing after eating is sleeping……not alone obviously, but with bae……as you are both headed to bed, you remember that your phone is still in your handbag…so you get it to check if maybe bae was texting you all that time and you dint reply because your phone was in your handbag and you were just there with him……but it has not even one text.
In bed, bae is still with his phone, texting and laughing…..you just lay there thinking of how his new girl is good for him, I mean she makes him laugh and forget completely about you….just through a text!!…and yet your funny looking face won’t even make him look at you. You start hating on yourself wondering why you even came to his place, wishing you just stayed home. You feel like grabbing his phone and throwing it away in some other planet called hell…..you just hate everything he is doing, even when he looks at you you feel like punching his face with a knife…..well if that is easy to do!
Bae turns around and looks at you and his face looks like he has just realized you have been there all this time……and you think he is about to put his phone down,but he doesn’t…he continues texting and smiling…..so you get jealous and this time you really wanna know who he is texting. So you act like you are actually going to caress him and as you are touching him slowly, you take a look at his phone…..and finally you get to see who the bitch he is texting is……it is not a bitch you can beat up and kill…..it’s a bitch you can’t even confront for a fight…..a bitch that is strong enough to steal your bae and you never get him back. A real and strong bitch, TWITTER!!
Twitter???…you just lay back wondering how he chooses twitter over you….i mean you know you are not funny, but you wonder what’s really good about this twitter thing that makes him not even want to look at you. So you login into your own twitter account and start stalking on his twitter, and you both lay down there…tweeting and smiling…without even having to look at each other ……..
Twitter and bae vs you……if you can’t beat em, join em!!